Thursday, November 15, 2012
I feel like Lady Edith today. I have been feeling like her for the whole of this year. She is from my tribe, truly. Too many things in common. So many questions circling in the head. Different caches of them to pick from. There is a recurring theme amongst them, but I am too chicken to name them lest the extent of my crazy is revealed. (Not that it hasn't been evident). It's just that I never felt this particular 'what if' with the previous one and with the current one, it's somewhat inevitable. Especially with someone like me.
Another recurring theme: Me.
Warring factions, where one is all about the 'screw this crap, I'm outta here' and the other side that's always wanted to belong, to be part of the norm, who's all about lessening the social anxiety. I always start the same way, and somewhere along, I'll do the next predictable thing and the next. Predictable but not quite helpful in the cause.
I dunno why I thought that when I'd be an adult, all my problems will magically disappear. How true that turned out to be, NOT. Labels: blame game
